Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Dear Sophie -

I've struggled with this post, because everything I wanted to say sounds so cliche:  I can't believe you're three years old!  You're growing up so fast!!  We just brought you home from the hospital 5 minutes ago as a tiny baby and now you're in preschool!! 

So, I had to think about what it is I really wanted to tell you. 

The truth of the matter is this.  I love being your mom more than anything I've ever done in my life and more than anything I could ever hope to experience.  There simply isn't enough time in either of our lives to love you the way I want to. It's what gives me hope, encourages me to have faith.  It makes me long for Jesus to come reign on earth right now, so time would never end and I could love you forever.  Being your mom makes me want to tell more people about God, in hopes of influencing their perspective on eternity.  Being with you makes everything else in this world seem a little duller.  Nothing holds a candle to the way you brighten this world.  Your enthusiasm for life and living it outloud is contagious.  There's no one - children and adult alike - that you encounter who doesn't leave as your friend.  You inspire me to be more bold in the world.  Have I mentioned how much I adore you??

I know there will be moments in your life - likely when you are a teenager - that you will question my love for you.  I'm bound to make decisions you won't agree with.  Or impose punishment you feel is unjust.  You might feel like I'm against you.  I promise you, there's nothing that could ever be further from the truth.  I am your biggest fan, your truest friend, and the person most changed because of the person you are. My love for you will never, ever,, not ever, change.  It will not fail.  I hope that's a truth you come to know all through your life.

I've loved you the longest, besides Daddy. Oh, and everyone else who got to meet you in those 4 hours after you were born before I did.  But you held out for me, didn't you?  You held it together for all of them, looking around and knowing something was missing.  Someone was missing.  The moment you finally found the comfort of my arms, you broke out in tears, and so did I. You couldn't keep it together anymore.  You're still that way.  I love that I am the one who you can be the most real with, with whom you share your truest colors.  I hope that aspect of our relationship never changes.  I pray that you will always seek comfort in my arms, my darling daughter.

Thank you for allowing me the honor of being you mom.  I can't think of a single luckier person in the world.  Here's to your 4th year on earth and a million more to us being together.

I love you princess,
your mommy  :)

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